The Aunts

Although my mother had sisters, when I think of my Aunts, I think of my father’s 4 sisters.  They were all strong women with lovely hair and very spindly legs.  As a child I sometimes wondered how those legs could hold up their bodies.  They were all religious, attending Mass regularly etc.  We visited each of them almost weekly.  No appointments or prior phone calls were made.  One just dropped in.  The coffee pot was put on and if there was nothing in the cupboard, someone sneaked out the back and went to the corner store to buy a sweet.  One had to eat for the visit to count with my Aunts! 

When I went to college and medical school, I had to visit each on return from Chicago and again before returning to school.  Of course, there were certain people on Mom’s side that I also had to visit.  I called this “making the rounds.”

Aunt Sarah (born Rosaria) was actually a half-sister to the rest.  Her father was Vincenzo Mastrosimone and she was born on Ground Hog’s Day 1897 in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania.  How or when my grandmother met my grandfather, Peter Lumia is unknown but she was pregnant by him in the spring of 1899.  My father was born on January 13, 1900 at 240 Elizabeth Street in NYC where they lived along with Peter’s cousins, Santo, Angelo and Alfonso.  By April my grandparents had moved to 185 Elizabeth Street with their 2 children.  Whether Grandmother married either man is the big family secret.

Aunt Sarah was spry and pretty.  She married very young and had 5 children.  Her husband was a barber from the same town in Sicily as the Lumias and he and I shared a birthday.  Her daughter said she was never satisfied.  I think she always felt as an outsider though Grandfather raised her from the age of 2.  Sarah died suddenly at 73, six months after my Dad and a year after her husband.

The second sister, Frances (born Maria Alfonsina) was named for Peter’s mother according to tradition.  She was a good cook.  At Christmas she made wonderful cream filled cookies, some of which she always saved for me.  She married a second cousin who came to the US in 1913.  Jim’s mother was Peter’s first cousin.  By 1918 he was living with the Lumias.  My father remembered that Uncle Jim caught the influenza and Dad helped take care of him.  Unfortunately, Uncle Jim was an alcoholic and they had a difficult marriage.  Additionally, their eldest son returned from WWII unharmed but died in an auto accident in 1951.  As the eldest son he was the apple of both their eyes.  Uncle Jim died 1958 from his alcoholism.  Their second son, Peter caught polio as an adult which left his legs quite weak.  He had a Down’s daughter and a son who became a drug addict and died at 35.  He divorced his first wife and had 2 sons before he finally married their mother.  However, that marriage also ended in divorce.

Through all of this Frances remained stoic and supportive of her children, including Peter.  She eventually went to live with her daughter, Marge and died in 1987 at 85.

The third daughter was Mary.  She was a sharp-tongued old maid who always sparred verbally with my Dad.  I always assumed that they did that as children too.  She lived with Grandmother and with the youngest sister and her family.  Mary worked in various sewing factories walking to work every day over a couple of big hills.  In 1958, she fell and broke her leg.  She recovered.   However, over the next 5 years or so, she broke the same leg several times.  Finally, the doctors decided that she had muscular dystrophy.  She could no longer work and was confined to the house.  My father did some simple repairs to the family home so that Mary could live on the first floor.  At some point she had to go into a nursing home where she remained until her death in January 1973.  I think at that point she just gave up.

Mary adored my brother, Peter. When he graduated from college, he was the first of her nieces or nephews to do so and she came to the ceremony.  She had always told my parents that she wanted to be there.  She usually called me “Peter.”  I visited her regularly in the nursing home.  My brother never did.  She still called me Peter! 

The youngest daughter was Catherine (born Cologia).  She married when she was 30ish and was the least attractive of the sisters.  She had a healthy son born about 1940 and then had a Down’s Syndrome son born in 1945.  That was very difficult for her and her husband.  However, she worked with the schools and the Church and fought for services.  Donald attended a special school for handicapped students until he was 21.  He received First Communion and Confirmation in the Church all because his mother fought for him!

After Uncle Pete died of a massive stroke in 1967, Donald became harder to handle.  She told him that it was time for him to go away to school, just as I and his brother had done and he happily went to the state facility at Vineland.  After my father died, she and Mom became even closer and Aunt Kate joined us for Holiday dinners.  I always felt close to her.  Aunt Kate developed pulmonary fibrotic disease and died of heart failure in 1978. She was only 70.